Moments

23 December 2014
He looked up and suddenly she was gone. He stood in the road outside his house, left alone with the moon and stars, which shone above ever so brightly as though a dark cloud hadn't just settled over his entire world.

4 months later, 4 April 2015
Adam Webber walked up to the practice of David Hill, a psychologist in the local clinic. Out of habit, he scrutinised the room before walking in. He could see a bookshelf just opposite the door, in the far right-hand corner he saw a large window, in front of which were two armchairs facing each other, separated by a coffee table. He turned to the right and saw the doctors desk in the corner, facing the window. There was another smaller bookshelf next to the desk. David, who was standing in front of the larger bookshelf smiled and began to speak, "Please, come in", motioning for Adam to enter the room. "Thanks...I'm not quite sure what to call you yet"  Adam walked towards David, holding out his hand. "Call me anything you like, David, doc, Dave, sir, buddy, whatever feels comfortable" replied David, shaking Adams hand and smiling. "Okay, I think I'll stick with doc" Adam replied and David led him to the two chairs in front of the window. When they got there Adam stopped and stared out of the window where he could see some trees which had grown around a pound in a field of the greenest grass he had ever seen. After staring for a few seconds he realised he had started smiling and looked down, "I see why your desk is facing the window now...You know, doc, I believe that just because one is depressed it doesn't mean one cannot smile at pretty things, do you think I could turn my chair to face the window?" he asked. "Yeah sure, whatever feels most comfortable to you...and I totally agree with that statement, I think it could go deeper to say that depressed people appreciate pretty things a lot more than those who are not, but that's a topic for another day. For now, let's just talk about you" replied David, sitting down in his armchair and facing Adam, who was now staring out of the window. "Well, I suppose we should...though, I'm not exactly sure how this works yet, so maybe you could start by asking me questions?" Adam asked, turning to look at David, who now sat with a pen and a note pad in hand. "Ok, that's fine by me...So what are you doing at the moment? Studying or working?" David asked. "Studying a BA degree, with hopes of becoming a journalist one day" Adam replied. "Journalism? That's quite interesting. Why, may I ask, that field?" he asked. "I love travelling, and writing, and journalism is one of the few careers which utilises both of those skills, if not journalism then I think I'd like to be a travel writer, though I think poetry is where my true passion lies" Adam replied, looking over at his psychologist and letting out a half smile, before returning his gaze to the window again. "Have you written many poe...?" Adam nodded before David could even finish his question. "What about?" David enquires, sounding genuinely interested. "I don't know, I used to write about life , I guess, I used to just write about any ideas or beliefs I had about life. But I don't want to talk about that just yet" Adam replied. "So, you made a remark about depressed people, do you feel like you're depressed? If so, then why?" David asked, setting his pen on the top page and getting ready to write. Adam laughed a little. "No no, I don't think I'm depressed, doc, I'm 100% sure I am. And the reason is quite simple: Ivy Phillips. It's funny how those two words basically describe my greatest joy and at the same time my greatest sorrow" he said, scratching at his beard with his right hand. David shifted into a more comfortable position in his seat, folding his legs and setting the notepad on his lap. "Ahh, I understand. How unfortunate, or maybe fortunate, you are, to be so young and yet to have already experienced the pains of love. Tell me about her, where did you first meet this girl?" he asked. "Well, it was last year, early in the year..." he began to have a flashback of the day he first met her.

It was still the first teaching block of the year, about three weeks after lectures had started. Adam was now in his second year at WITS University and had decided to join the photography club. Their first assignment was to take pictures of anything on campus that they thought was picture-worthy. The first thing Adam decided to take a picture of was the steps outside the central block building, but taken from the library lawns so that the fountain and the jacaranda trees were in the picture. He stepped onto the lawns and found the perfect spot to take the picture. He looked at the picture on the screen of his Canon digital camera and realised there was someone sitting alone underneath one of the jacaranda trees. It was a girl. She seemed to be listening to music and reading a book. Adam moved in to get a close-up of her. Before taking the picture he stopped for a moment to appreciate the beautiful sight of this pretty girl sitting under a pretty tree, then he took the picture and made sure it was okay on the screen on his camera, when he looked up again she was standing right in front of him, still holding her book. "Well, is it a good picture?" she asked. For a few seconds he was left speechless, partly because of how beautiful she was, partly because he was sure she hadn't seen him taking the picture. Before speaking he scrutinised her, out of habit. She was roughly his height, her skin was light brown, her hair was brunette and had a reddish tone to it and in the sunlight he could see that her eyes were brown. Her hair was tied up in a bun. She was wearing a blue dress with blue sneakers. "Hello?" she asked, waving her hands in front of his face, trying to bring him back from wherever he had just disappeared to. He laughed a little. "Sorry. Yes, it's a good picture" he said, smiling. "Would you like to see?" he asked, holding out his camera. She took the camera and looked at the screen for a few seconds before handing it back. "What are you going to do with it?" she asked. "Well, I'm going to look at it again at home. And if I like it, I'm going to keep it for my assignment, if not I'll delete it" he replied. "Okay. You could have asked first, you know. I wouldn't have said no" she said, walking back to her spot under the tree. He decided to follow her, feeling intrigued by her. "I prefer taking them when people aren't aware. That way everything is so natural, the emotion is real, you know? I think that's when people are the most beautiful, when they think no ones looking" he says. "Wow that's...that's cool actually, I've never thought about it like that" she said, sitting back down in her spot. "Can I join you?" he asked, looking down at her. "Sure, why not?" she replied, smiling. "I'm Adam, by the way" he said, sitting opposite her. "Ivy" she replied. "So what are you doing here all by yourself?" he asked. She lifted the book up, "Sometimes I prefer the company of music and books, you know?" she said, putting the book down again. "Kind of...I'm more of a writer than a reader, though" he replied, crossing his legs and leaning back on one arm, the camera next to him. "Oh. What have you written?" she asked. "Mostly poems, but I've written some short stories as well" he said, reaching out for her book: The Perks of Being A Wallflower. "I'd love to read them some time, I like poems" she said, wrapping her earphones around her iPod. "We'll see, I don't generally let people read them...I've read this book, thought it was pretty average to be honest" he said, putting the book down. "I'm sure you can make an exception for me. I mean, after all, you did just take a picture of me without my permission" she says, smiling. He smiles and looks down, "I guess so", she picks up the book and looks at the front cover. "And I disagree. This is my second time reading it, I think it's absolutely brilliant, especially the way it's written as his diary entries, it makes it so... real" she put the book down again and looked at Adam. They make eye contact for the first time and for a few seconds neither of them blinked or looked away. Then suddenly her eyes went wide, as though she had just remembered she had forgotten the stove on at home, and Adam looked down. She put her book and iPod in her bag and stood up. "I've gotta go, my dad will be here soon" she said, as Adam stood up. "I know we just met but, could I have your number? I'd love to talk to you some more" he said, smiling. "Honestly, I thought you'd never ask" she replied, winking. He hands her his phone and she saves her number. "I'll dial it, just so you can be sure, yeah?" she said, and her phone started ringing in her pocket. Adam smiled and all he was able to say was "It's nice to meet you" before she walked away. He turned around and bent down to pick his camera up.

When he looked up again he was back in the office of his new psychologist, staring out of the window again. "Really? Sounds like a scene out of a movie, to be honest" said Dr Hill, still writing Adams story in his notepad. "I know...that's what's so perfect about it" Adam replied. "So, what happened after that?" David asked, rolling his right hand around, getting ready to start writing again. "Let's change the topic for a bit. You asked about my poems earlier on. They used to be about life, like I said, nothing in specific, just everything I believed to be true about life. That is, until I met her. Then I started writing about the way she made me feel. And it was great, honestly, probably the best stuff I had ever written. And now...now all my writing is so morbid and full of sorrow, and that's when I even do write. Which is the main reason I decided that it was time to come here, I want to write again" Adam said, shaking his head. "This is good, you're opening up" David said, writing something in his notepad, "When is the last time you've written something?" Adam turned to look at him. "About a month ago, I think" he replied, before turning back to the window. "Okay, your first exercise is to write something. It can be a poem, a story, an essay, a paragraph or even a sentence, and it can be about anything, whatever comes to mind, just write it down. What I would also recommend is getting a journal and at the start of each day you could write about everything you'd like to do in the day, like setting some short-term goals to accomplish, and at the end of each day you could write about what you actually did during the day, and if you didn't accomplish any of your goals you could write about what prevented you from doing so, and what you can do to stop this distraction from happening again. Also, your goals should be fairly positive things, you know, like going for a run, or learning something new, or going out to meet new people, just anything positive" David said, lifting his pen from the notepad. "Exercise?' Adam asked, sounding confused. "You didn't think you would just come here, talk about your problems and get better, did you? If so, you were sorely mistaken. When you first made your appointment you said that you hope to leave a little happier, well, the pursuit of happiness is a proactive activity, something that you have to work at" replied David, adjusting his glasses. "Hmmm, fair enough..shall we continue?" Adam asked. "By all means" David nodded, getting ready to start writing again. "I didn't speak to her again until the Friday after we met...I called her early that evening.." said Adam, closing his eyes and beginning to have another flashback.

He was sitting at the dinner table with his family. On his left, at the head of the table, sat his father, Michael Webber, a lawyer who owned his own firm. On his right was his younger brother, Toby, who was now in grade 10 at the same high school Adam had attended. Sitting directly opposite him was his mother, Lauren, who worked as a writer, Adams biggest role model in life. After having supper Adam went to his bedroom and sat on his bed. He took his phone out and turned it around in his hands for a few minutes, building up the courage to dial her number. He felt his heart rate rise just a little, and his breaths became shorter. He stood up and paced around his room, thinking about the perfect conversation starter. After being unable to come up with anything he sat down on the chair behind his desk and dialed her number. She answered almost immediately, and spoke as if she knew who was calling, "Hey you" Adam smiled. "Um, how did you know who it was?" he asked. "I dialed my number from your phone, remember?" she replied. Adams smile grew bigger. "What took you so long anyway?" she asked, filling the silence. "Uhm, well. I thought I'd keep you waiting a little" he replied, jokingly. She let out a little laugh, "Smooth, so what's up?" she asked. "Well, are you doing anything tonight? I thought we could go out for ice cream, or something, if you're not busy?" he asked, now pacing his room again. For a few seconds she didn't say anything and he thought the call might have been cut but then he heard faint voices in the background. "Okay, I've gotta be home by 10 though" she said, with excitement in her voice. "Okay, great! Text me your address and I'll there in about 20, yeah?" he said, trying hard to hide his excitement. "Make it 40?" she replied. "Yeah okay, see you soon" he said, hanging up. Toby walked into the room just as his brother did an air punch and started laughing. "What are you doing?" he asked. "I've got a date" Adam replied, looking slightly embarrassed. "Nice. Need some pointers, I mean, it is your first one, right?" Toby asked sarcastically, sitting on the bed. "Ha ha, very funny. I've been on more dates than you, little bro, and don't ever forget it" Adam replied winking. He walked to his cupboard and picked out what he was going to wear for the evening: a black "Man of steel" t-shirt, a khaki pair of chinos and black sneakers. He decided to take a shower before getting dressed. With a towel wrapped around his waist he walked back into his now-empty bedroom. From his brothers room he could hear the strumming of a guitar and realised what Toby had come to his room for. He put his clothes on and styled his hair with some hair gel. He left his room to find his father. "Dad, can I go out with my friend?" he asked, walking up to his father. "Looks like you've already answered that question" replied his father, noticing his change of clothes and hairstyle. "Sorry, I was just so excited I forgot to ask you...I met this girl and.." he was cut off before he could finish his sentence. "Take my card, it's on me tonight" his father said, taking out his wallet from his pocket. "Wow! Really? Thanks" Adam replied, reaching out for the card. "Yeah, she must be really special if you already showered before asking for my permission...also, once upon a time, I went up to my dad saying 'I met this girl' and today she's my wife" said his father, winking and patting him on the shoulder before walking away. When he was sure 40 minutes had passed he sent Ivy a message saying "On my way", greeted his mom and left. He got to Ivys' house fifteen minutes later, finding it without any problems. She was sitting outside on a swing on the veranda next to a man who appeared to be her father. They were laughing about something. Adam walked up to the house and they stood up, as soon as he saw Ivy in the light he stopped walking and stared at her for a few seconds. She was wearing the same dress she had on the day they met, but she had on sandals instead of sneakers, and  her hair was tied in a bow. She caught his eye and let out a shy smile. "He zones out sometimes" she said to her father. After a few seconds he walked up to her father and held out his hand. "Good evening sir, I'm Adam" he said. "So you're the photographer? I've gotta tell you, that was smooth. I'm Ivys' father, William. Nice to meet you" he said, shaking Adams hand and laughing a little. Adams eyes went wide and he was left speechless. "All ready to go, superman?" she asked, tapping his shoulder and breaking the silence. "It's nice to meet you too, sir. We'll be back by 10" Adam said, before turning to Ivy with his arm held out. She kissed her father on the cheek and took Adams arm. "I'm more of a Batman type of girl, you know" she said as they walked towards the car. "Next time I'll pick you up in my Bat-mobile then" he replied. He opened the door for her and she giggled, "Such a gentleman" Adam closed the door and walked around to the other side of the car. "You sound surprised" he replied, while opening the door. "Little bit..." she said, as he got into the car. "I didn't zone out back there, you know, I was just thinking about how beautiful you look" he said, closing the door. She blushed, "Thank you...so where are we going?" she asked. "You'll see" he replied. "I love this ice cream shop!" she exclaimed as they pulled into the parking lot of "The Hitchhikers pit stop". "I used to come here all the time when I was a kid" Adam replied. They got a table on the balcony of the two-story building and sat opposite each other. Ivy ordered the "Friday night chocolate and mint milkshake" while Adam ordered a normal chocolate milkshake. "No way! You come to the best ice cream/milkshake shop in town and you order something plain" Ivy rolled her eyes as their waiter walked away. "Hey , chocolate milkshakes are my favourite okay" replied Adam, smiling. "Do you always stick to stuff you know?" she asked, leaning forward. "Always" Adam replied, leaning forward as well. "Not tonight. We're swapping" Ivy said, winking. Adam started laughing. "I see what's going on here. I see right through you" Adam replied. "Oh really? Enlighten me?" Ivy replied, sounding intrigued. "You've realised what a horrible mistake you made in not ordering a chocolate milkshake and now you want mine" Adam replied in a sarcastic tone, raising his eyebrows. Ivy laughed for a few seconds and Adam sat watching her, stunned at how beautiful she was in that moment. "Okay, you caught me, smart guy. Either way, we're swapping!" she replied. When the milkshakes came Ivy took the chocolate and mint and slid it over to Adams side of the table. "Welcome to the wild side" she said, smiling. "If I don't like it, we're swapping again" he returned the smile. "So...tell me about yourself, stranger" she said, taking a sip of her milkshake. "Do you always let strangers buy you milkshake?" he asked. "Pretty much. Who else is going to?" she replied, jokingly. "Well, what would you like to know?" he took a sip of the milkshake and his eyes went wide. He took another sip, realising that he actually liked it. "You like it! I knew you would!" Ivy started smiling. "Fine, I'll admit, it's pretty decent" he replied, taking another sip. "Decent?! It's the best thing since, well, it's just the best thing! But anyway, what are you studying and why?" she took a sip of her milkshake. "I'm studying a BA degree with hopes of becoming a journalist, or a travel writer, and I guess the reason is that I love writing and travelling, and I believe that that's all that matters, you know, doing what you love" he replied, "What about you?" she took another sip, "I'm doing a BSc degree with the hopes of becoming something one day...I don't really know what I want to do...I like psychology though, which is one of my majors so that's cool...So when can I read some of your poems" she asks. "Sorry, I don't let strangers read my poems" he replied, grinning. "Do you always buy strangers milkshakes?" she asked. "Pretty much" he winked, "But, I'll put one or two on my phone and show you on Monday?" he replied, taking a sip of his milkshake. "Who said I want to see you again on Monday?" she replied sarcastically. "Ahh, and I thought I was being so smooth again, damn" he rested his chin on his hand and looked at her, smiling. She reached out for his other hand, "It would be a great privilege to see you again on Monday...and every other day" she squeezed his hand and let go. "Damn, and I just wanted Monday" he replied. "Well, you've gotta take what you get" she said. "So...how come I only met your dad tonight?" he asked. "Well, my mom passed away when I was five" she replied, looking down. "Oh, I'm so sorry" he said, reaching for hand and holding it for a few seconds before letting it go again. "It's okay, I was very young. I feel really bad for my dad though...you know, he loved her very much, still does...I want to experience that before I die, to love completely and unconditionally and be loved back completely and unconditionally, I think it's the most beautiful thing" she said, looking up again with her eyes wide and filled with passion as she spoke. "You know. I think most people want that, but not many people know what love actually is" he said. "What is love to you?" she leaned forward in her seat. He leaned forward and his eyes caught hers. Locked in eye contact he began to speak. "Love is a constant, it's not something that's there one day and gone the next; it's something you always feel. It's not something that's based solely on physical attractions or non-physical connections, but rather on how those two come together, because once you love someone for who they are, they're the most physically attractive person you'll ever meet. Love is also unconditional, you know. It doesn't depend on anything, because once you feel it, you feel it and there's no going back" he said. She started smiling, "That was so beautiful" , he laughed a little. "That's just what I believe though" he said, leaning back in his seat. "Wow! Let me ask you something, have you ever written anyone a poem?" she asked. "No, I've never had anyone to write about...tell you what, I'll write a poem for you one day" he said. "Keep talking like that and I may just fall for you" she smiled. Adam laughed. "Are we going to pretend you haven't already?" he asked, smiling. Ivy blushed and looked down. She looked up suddenly with wide eyes realising what time it was. "We should go" she said. When they got to her house Adam took a seat on the swing on the veranda while Ivy went to tell her father she was home. She came out sat next to Adam, leaving some space between them. "So, you think I've fallen for you?" she asked turning to look at him. He moved closer to her, leaving no space between them. He turned to face her, resting his left leg on the swing. "Not only that" he said, resting his hand on her back, "I think I've fallen for you too" He leaned forward, bringing his face closer to hers. Their eyes met. He stayed there for a while, then leaned in further, leaving no space between them, and their lips met. He closed his eyes.

When he opened them the sight that met him wasn't Ivys eyes, but instead the pond outside Dr Hills office. "They say that it all goes downhill after the first kiss, but not for us, doc. After that night, everything changed, for the better" he said, rubbing his eyes. "How so?" David asked looking over at Adam. "We started meeting up at university, at first only during lunch time but after a while whenever we had free time we spent it together, and still it wasn't enough. She met my friends and I met hers, but most of the time we just wanted to be alone. We spent weekends together, not always doing something in particular, just being together was enough. I watched her favourite movies and shows and she watched mine. I got to know her, deep down to the very core of who she was, and in return I opened up myself to her. She studied me and I studied her" he said. "When did things start going wrong?" David asked, shifting a little in his seat. "We'll get there. Let me tell you about the first time I wrote her a poem. We had decided to go to the park a few blocks away from her house..." he started having a flashback to that day.

They were walking towards the park in their town, her fingers intertwined in his, as though their hands were designed to fit each others perfectly. They weren't saying much, but that was the beauty of their relationship; the silence was comfortable. They sat on one of the benches at the park, which was empty except for some kids playing on the jungle gym and a few people walking through it. Adam turned to face Ivy. "So, do you remember on our first date I told you I'd write you a poem one day?" he asked. Her face seemed to light up. "Do you have it?" she asked smiling. Adam nodded and reached into his pocket, pulling out a folded page. "I was thinking I could read it to you?" he asked. Ivy nodded excitedly. Adam got up and stood in front of Ivy, looking down at her. His eyes meet hers.
"I look at you and you look at me,
 and suddenly I have so much to say.
 about your smile,
 and how I find it so pleasant,
 like a warm summer day,
 about your eyes,
 and how, for me, they shine much brighter than
 the galaxies I tend to lose myself in,
 about your hair,
 and the way it curls into your "Mufasa look",
 I look at you and you look at me,
 and suddenly I know why they say
 'The best things in life are free'" he spoke slowly, holding the page in front of him, looking down at it a few times. Ivy lifted her hands to cover her mouth, because she had started smiling and blushing. "What?" Adam asked, folding the page again. "It was perfect" she replied, standing to hug him. They held each other for a while, his arms around her waist, her arms wrapped around his back. Her head resting in the curve of his neck. They sat on the bench again and she rested her head on his shoulder, he put his arm around her.

"...And we just sat there for a while, until the sun set" he turned to look at David who was making some notes. "Right, I see. Not a bad poem, just by the way" said David. "Thank you, doc" replied Adam smiling and turning to face the window again. "So, are you ready to tell me when things started going awry?" David asked. "Yeah, we're at that part of the story" Adam sank into his seat a little. "Before I start telling you about that, you should know that Ivy and I were almost completely different, in terms of our interests, our likes and dislikes, our beliefs about certain things and even what we were studying, but we fit together so well. There was absolutely no friction, and I've come to learn that when people say stuff like "relationships require a little friction" or "you shouldn't worry when you fight, you should worry when you don't fight because it means that you don't care enough to fight" they aren't always right, because Ivy and I never had anything to argue or fight about. We didn't always agree, sure, but we were both so compromising that there was no need for a fight. I let her do her thing, and she let me do mine, and eventually there was no 'her thing' or 'my thing', it was just 'our thing'. Which makes the night she told me she was leaving the first time we ever had friction. It also happens to be the first time I told her I love her" Adam said, his head hanging low, staring for the first time at the ground and not at the window. "So, what happened?" David asked. "Well, it was early evening and we had decided to walk to this cafe not too far from my house. We stayed for a while, and everything seemed normal. Then we left at about 8 or 9, when it was dark. She asked me if we could talk for a while on this bench we passed, and I agreed without thinking twice because I had just written her another poem and couldn't wait to recite it to her..." Adam closed his eyes and began to have a flashback of that night.

They had just sat down on the bench and Ivy was staring at the sky, Adam was staring at her. "Guess what" he said, standing up. "What?" she asked, shifting her gaze from the bright moon to Adam, who now stood in front of her. "I wrote you another poem" he said excitedly. "Adam..." she began to say before he cut her off, starting to recite his poem.
"I wanted to write you a poem,
 to tell you how much I
 enjoy your company,
 to tell you how much I
 hate it when we're apart,
 to tell you how much I
 like our conversations,
 to tell you how much I
 adore our comfortable silences,
 to tell you how much I
 appreciate every second I ever got to hold your hand,
 to tell you how much I
 wish I could kiss your soft lips more often,
 the truth is,
 I wanted to write you a poem
 just to tell you how much I love you" by the time he had finished the poem Ivy had tears rolling down her cheeks. Adam sat next to her and put his arm around her, pulling her closer. She rested her head on his shoulder and he held her for a while. Then she lifted her head and turned to face him. "I'm leaving" she said, sniffing. "What? Leaving?" Adam asked, looking confused. "Earlier on in the year I applied for a scholarship to study overseas next year and I got accepted...I didn't tell you because I didn't think I would, their requirements were ridiculous and..." Adam cut her off, his eyes were wide. "That's great, Ivy! Wow, I'm really proud of you" he spoke excitedly, taking her hands in his. "Adam, aren't you upset?" she asked. "I suppose, but I know it's always been a dream of yours and I wouldn't dare beguile you of it!" he replied. "I have a few days to accept or reject it..you know, if you asked me to stay I..." she let go of Adams hands to wipe her face. "Ask you to stay? Ivy, I could never" Adam stood and after a while Ivy did too. They began walking towards Adams house, not saying anything, and Ivy slid her fingers into his when Adam realised something; she hadn't said it back and then, even though they were holding hands, Adam felt, for the first time, like they couldn't have been farther apart. It was also the first time their silence felt uncomfortable. He dropped her off at home and everything changed. She decided to accept the offer the next day and it was set; she was to fly to England on the 20th of December. They stopped seeing each other as often, their conversations became shorter and forced and, which Adam found most upsetting, their silence remained uncomfortable. The night before she left, Ivy drove to Adam's house. She said goodbye to his brother and parents and they went outside. "Adam...we need to talk" she said, stopping by the door of her fathers car. She began speaking slowly, her voice shaking a little. "On the night of our first date, I told you that before I die I want to love someone completely and unconditionally and be loved, by that person, in return, and you have given me that. These past few months have probably been the best of my life. The night you told me you love me, I didn't say it back, not because I don't, but because I knew what was coming. I knew that if I told you I love you right before I told you I'm leaving it wouldn't have had the effect on you that I would have wanted to. Now, things have changed, but I know that our feelings have stayed the same. However, I think that maybe we should..." Ivy stopped speaking and looked down. Adam stepped closer to her and lifted her face, until her eyes met his. "Ivy, you should know something, about the night of our first date, when I was walking towards you and your father and I froze; That night when I saw you, I fell in love. And I think you smiled because you knew...so please don't say what I think it is you're about to say. Things have changed, and will continue to change, but we can get through it, together" he said. "We should...we should break up, Adam. I wish that what we had could last forever, but everything comes to an end" she turned her face away. "Fine then. If that's what you want" he said, stepping back. She stepped forward and kissed him lightly on the cheek. He looked down, accepting defeat. "I just want you to know, I do love you. More than you'll probably ever know...I hope we meet again some day, when we could last. Because our love deserves nothing less than forever" she said, before climbing into her father's car and driving away. He looked up and suddenly she was gone. He stood in the road outside his house, left alone with the moon and stars, which shone above ever so brightly as though a dark cloud hadn't just settled over his entire world. He closed his eyes, fighting back tears.

When he opened he eyes he could feel the tears he had tried so hard to fight back rolling down his cheeks and wiped them away. "Sorry, doc. I tend to be a bit sensitive around this topic" he sniffs. "It's alright. This is your space" David replied. "You know what hurts the most? The fact that she didn't even say goodbye. She just got in the damn car and drove away, and that was it. No text, no email, no phone call, no nothing. I don't know how one can just wake up one day and decide that they're going to cut someone out of their life, I just don't get it, doc. At the end of the day, I have learnt one thing though " Adam said, looking over at Dr Hill. "What's that?" David asked. "I've learnt to appreciate each and every moment in its entirety, whether it's good or bad, because the truth is that nothing ever happens exactly the same way twice, and often we find ourselves wishing to relive certain moments which, at the time, we didn't fully appreciate" Adam replied, still looking at Dr Hill. "You know, Adam, there are no wise words that I, nor anyone else for that matter, can say to stop the pain. In fact, that is something that only you can do, and by you coming here you've taken the first step. There is this saying that I like, and I'd like to share it with you: 'One day, whether you are 14, 28 or 65  you will stumble upon someone who will start a fire in you that cannot die. However, the saddest, most awful truth you will ever come to find is that they are not always with whom we spend our lives' and you should know that though this may be true, it does not mean that all hope is lost, because life goes on, you know. We meet new people, we make new memories. We can learn to love again, and that, I believe, is the beauty of life"

Written by Mohamed Zayyan Variawa

P.S. 1) Both poems in the story were written by the me, but were inspired by someone very special to me.
        2) The quote "I look at you and you look at me, and now I know why they say the best things are free" is not my own, I saw it online, but I'm not sure who the author is.
        3) The quote "That night when I saw you, I fell in love. And I think you smiled because you knew" comes from poet and writer Arrigo Boito: "When I saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew"

Hero

Jacob Khumalo raises his hand to cover his mouth as he yawns, standing in the middle of Empire Road, outside WITS University, at 7 am on Monday morning. Even though he has been doing this since the start of the year, and it's now the beginning of August, he hasn't grown used to it. He closes his eyes and thinks about the job he had in the previous year, before he got "retrenched", a packer at Pick n Pay. He opens his eyes to see the group of cars that now approach him and tries not to think about the cars themselves. He tries not to think about the price of the brand new BMW leading the crowd of cars, or how half of that money could buy his family food and clothes for a whole year. He fakes a smile, as he always does, because it's hard finding something to smile about in this life. Except his daughter, Miracle. When he thinks of her he can't stop himself from smiling. The brand new BMW stops right next to him. He taps gently on the window, trying his best not to get his dirty fingerprints on this divine car, and smiles at the driver. Even though he's been ignored over a thousand times, it still hurts. He has always believed that the least these people in their fancy cars could do is take note of his existence, and return the smile. Disappointed he starts walking to the next car when he feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns around and faces a boy, who looks to be 18. The boy is roughly his height but has a more muscular build. "Good morning sir. It's not much, but it's something" said the boy, smiling and holding out his hand. Jacob could see a ten rand note and suddenly a real smile replaced the fake one he practiced so hard to keep. He takes the money. "Thank you sir. God bless" he says, bowing his head. "No no. I'm Mathew, not sir. God bless you too, my friend" replies the boy before turning around to walk away. That must be an angel, Jacob thinks to himself as he walks to the next car, still smiling.

A week later

Jacob stands over his five year old daughter and watches her sleep for a while before kissing her on the forehead. He walks toward his wife, Petunia, and tries to kiss her on the cheek before leaving, but she pulls away. "Why now, Petunia?" he asks, shaking his head. "You know why!" she replies, in a raised voice. "Please be quiet, you'll wake Miracle. I know we're struggling, but I can't. It goes against everything I believe in. My parents always taught me that it's not the answer. And look at that girl, what would happen to her if something were to happen to me?" he asks, walking towards her, "God will provide" She crosses her arms and shakes her head, "God? That child will starve before God provides!" she says. He hears in her voice the same thing he feels inside: fear. "I've got to go. Please, just have faith. God will provide" he kisses her on the cheek and walks towards the door of the shack and opens it. "Just do it, please. Just tell him you're in" she says. He turns around and looks at her and then leaves. When he gets to his spot outside WITS University, William is already there. William walks up to him, but Jacob shakes his head. "Look. I can do it alone. But I know you have a daughter, and you're struggling. Let me help you out. It's an easy job, it'll take less than fifteen minutes" William says. Jacob shakes his head and starts to walk away. "Think about it! It's happening at 5" William shouts, before running to his side of the road. Jacob sighs and struggles to put on his fake smile. The rumbling in his stomach makes it hard to ignore Williams plan.

Mathew White wakes up to the sound and buzzing of the alarm he set on his iPhone. He grabs his phone and taps the "turn off" button almost furiously. Once the sound is off his head falls back onto his pillow and he closes his eyes, intending to lay there for only a minute. He opens his eyes again to the sound of his father, Phil, knocking on his door. Phil White was born and educated in America, he moved to South Africa to complete his PhD in Astronomy at the University Of Cape Town, even though he loved astronomy he decided to follow his true passion: teaching. He taught math and physics at a high school in the area where they now lived. "Ok, ok, I'm up!" Mathew yells, sitting up in his bed and rubbing his eyes. He looks at the time on his phone, 6:20 am, ten minutes had passed. "Jesus, this must be what hell is like" he whispers to himself as he gets out of bed. He walks to his light switch and turns it on, squinting as his eyes struggled to adjust to the light. He opens his cupboard door and grabs the first things he gets his hands on; a blue and white checkered shirt and a red chino shorts. He slips on his navy blue all stars and styles his hair. In ten minutes he's dressed and walks down the passage to the bathroom, to brush his teeth. When he gets to the kitchen his mother, Lucy, is sitting alone drinking coffee and reading the morning paper. Lucy White was an English teacher, at the same school as her husband. They met while doing an education course at WITS University, where their son now studied towards a degree in computational and applied mathematics. "Do you need money for lunch?" Phil asks as he walks into the kitchen. "No, it's ok. I still have some" replies Mathew, taking a bite of his slice of toast. "And for your bus card?" Phil asks, taking a sip of his coffee. Mathew shakes head. After everyone has eaten they all get into Phils black Toyota Auris. They drop Mathew off at the Rea Vaya bus stop in their town and then drive to the high school where they teach. Mathew walks towards the area where he waits for a bus and spots the girl he met in his math class, Carly Wilson. She doesn't see him at first, but as he gets closer she spots him and smiles. He returns the smile and walks up to her, admiring her beauty as he walks. She was slightly shorter than him, her skin was a golden-brown, her hair stopped at her shoulders and she had the most beautiful smile he had ever seen, but what he liked most about her were light brown eyes. She was wearing a sleeveless floral dress which stopped just above her knees, with black sneakers. She also had a white fedora hat on. "You look like spring day" he said, smiling as he hugged her. "Speak for yourself" she replied. They held each other for a few seconds before letting go. "So how was your weekend? Get much studying done?" she asked. "Don't make me laugh" he replied, smiling. "Oh of course. Mr Social. Never at home longer than he has to be" she replies, rolling her eyes, "you're lucky that you're really smart" she smiles and pokes him. "I should be so lucky. I would ask, but I know you spent most of your weekend studying" he replies, looking at her. "Oh come on. I've told you a thousand times, some of us have to study a lot harder than others, just to get above average marks" she replies. "Oh please, you're probably the smartest person I know" he says, putting his arm around her shoulder. "Hmph, you must know really dumb people then" she replies and they both start laughing. They get on the bus and sit next to each other, engaging each other in conversation. In just under 15 minutes they arrive at the station outside WITS University. They start crossing the road when Mathew points at one of the guys asking for money. "That's the guy I was telling you about! The one who was asking the lady in the BMW for money. Ahh man, it was really upsetting to see how pained he was when she didn't even roll down the window or anything. I mean, I'm sure the least she could have done was roll down the window..." he was getting really upset, and talking really fast before Carly interrupted him. "Hey, hey. Calm down. I know it's unfair, but don't worry, one day you can be a hero and change the world, I promise. For now though, let's just try and not get run over" she says, wrapping her arm in his and resting her head on his arm as they walked towards the university. He lets out a smile. At 7:45am they make it to their first class of the day: Applied Maths. After their last class, Mathew and Carly walk towards the bus stop. "Hey, do you wanna come over?" she asks, wrapping her arm around his, "we can chill" He looks down at her, "Sure. But only if you promise that you won't force me to study, like last time" he says, smiling. "Ahh, well I can't promise that. But I have a feeling that you're going to come anyway" she replies, and they laugh. With his free hand he takes out his phone to tell his father that he is going to Carlys house. He checked the time, 16:45pm. Jacob walks over to William, "I'm in. But no one gets hurt" he says. WIlliam nods and they walk to a quiet spot behind one of the nearby buildings. William opens the bag he is carrying and takes out a mask and a gun. Jacob takes the mask but shakes his head at the gun. "Just in case" William says. Jacob shakes his head and takes the gun, hiding it under his shirt. Please forgive me mama. They walk into the bus stop and wait on the seats. Mathew and Carly walk into the bus stop a few minutes after Jacob and William. Jacob is staring at the ground, shaking his head and Mathews eyes are focused on Carly, so they don't see each other. When the bus comes Mathew and Carly get seats at the back while Jacob and William get seats at the front. As soon as the bus starts moving they put their masks on. Jacob runs to the front of the bus and points his gun at the driver, yelling at him to stop while William fires a shot out of one of the windows to get everyones attention. "Now listen here. Nobody is going to get hurt, just put all your phones and wallets in this bag, and we'll be gone. If you refuse, I can't guarantee your safety" he says, as he passes his bag to the lady closest to him. Mathew turns to Carly and whispers in her ear, "Get down and call the cops, I'll distract them" and before she could refuse, Mathew was standing with his hands in the air, walking towards the first masked man. Carly stared in horror before she remembered what Mathew had told her to do. When the guy was fully focused on Mathew, she crouched in front of her seat and phoned the police, telling them what was happening. "Hey boy, sit down before you get hurt" said William. Jacob recognised the boy, "Mathew!" he shouted across the bus. Shocked, Mathew looked at the second masked man. The voice behind the mask sounded vaguely familiar. The man began to take off his mask when Mathew realised who he was, "No. Don't. They'll see you. Please stop this, it's not too late" he said, walking forward. Jacob was about to speak when William started screaming. "Shut up man! Sit down or I'll shoot you" he said, walking towards Mathew and holding out his gun. Mathew acted so fast that William didn't see it coming; he lurched forward and grabbed the gun. There was a short struggle and then the defeaning sound of a gun shot came. Carly stood up and ran towards Mathew, thinking he had been shot. Mathew eyes were wide with terror, he took a step back and looked down but after he realised he wasn't bleeding he looked at the man in front of him, who was clutching his stomach as he fell to his knees. The gun fell to the floor and Mathew picked it up and handed it to Carly. He looked at Jacob, "Please stop this. You can leave now, it's not too late" he said, his voice was shaking now. Jacob nodded and started lowering his gun when the left windscreen of the bus seemed to explode. Jacob dropped his gun and Mathew could see a policeman aiming his gun at Jacob. Mathew began to scream, "No!", as the policeman fired another bullet. He could see Jacobs eyes go wide. Jacob began to think of his daughter and this time he didn't smile, he started crying knowing that he wouldn't be able to just see her one more time, realising now that he had made a mistake. Then he fell forward and hit the ground with a thud.

by Mohamed Zayyan Variawa
comments welcomed at zv0344@gmail.com

The mark

Jack stood in front of his mirror, as he did every morning before he left the house to make sure he looked presentable. He thought it was especially important to perform the routine this morning because he was going to work and not school. He stared at his reflection for a few seconds. He already had a black jeans and his black all stars on but no shirt. He always styled his hair before putting a shirt on, so that he could avoid getting water or gel on it. Once he was satisfied with his comb over, he put on the shirt. It was plain white, customary of iStore employees, and long-sleeved. Even though it was summer he had requested long-sleeved shirts only, and he didn't intend on rolling up the sleeves. All his shirts and t-shirts are long sleeved, so that he could hide his mark. Most people are comfortable showing their marks to the world, wearing it like hearts on their sleeves, but he felt that his mark wasn't anyone else’s business. The only other people to have seen his mark are his parents, his friends from primary school and the doctor who delivered him, and he planned to keep it that way until he met her.

The reason he didn't hide it in primary school was that he didn't know any better and he wasn't concerned because in those days no one really paid attention to it. He rolled up his right sleeve just up passed his forearm so that he could glance at it. It had a very odd shape, like a circle with one end pulled outward. He heard stories of the strangest marks; some, when completed, even formed the shape of animals. He rolled his sleeve down and left the room, making his way toward the kitchen where his parents, and breakfast, were waiting. "Nervous?" asks his mother, Susan, putting an arm on his shoulder. Susan Graham worked as a librarian in their town. Since it was so close to their house she walked there and back every day, claiming that the exercise was good for her. She worked at the library in her school days and enjoyed it so much that she decided to stay.

She met Jacks father, Steve, while working. She joked that she knew he was the one instantly, for two reasons. The first being that his mark completed hers and the second being that he was checking out the entire Harry Potter series. Together, their marks made a circle. A circle is said to have many symbolic meanings, from strength to psyche. In the context of love, however, it symbolises connectedness, wholeness and unity. Jack always enjoyed hearing the stories of how couples met because, even though it's inevitable, the universe seemed to always have interesting ways of bringing people together. By most standards Jack could be considered to be somewhat of a hopeless romantic, desiring desperately to meet the one. "Not at all" he replies, smiling. "That's my boy" says his father, nodding approvingly. "Come on, eat something. We leave in fifteen minutes." says Steve.

 Jack isn't a big eater and is full after one sunny side up egg on a slice of toast with a cup of coffee. Since the mall wasn't very far from their house, and these days there's hardly ever traffic, they got there in just under twenty minutes. Steve studied pharmacy through UNISA and, instead of opening his own pharmacy, decided to take up a position at Dischem. Dischem was close to the entrance of the mall so Steve didn't have a very long way to walk. "See you at lunch?" he turns around and shouts out to Jack. "Yea, sure, I'll call you" Jack replies over his shoulder. He lifts his left arm to look at the time on his watch, 7:45am. He has been to the mall hundreds of times but never this early and has never seen it this empty. He makes his way to the iStore. When he gets there it is 7:50 am and the doors are still closed. The other employees stand outside and wait for the guy with the keys, who is obviously late. Jack sees two familiar faces, two people he met during training; Natalie and Fred. He makes his way towards them and as soon as Natalie sees him she smiles and waves.

She is shorter than him, her skin is light, her hair is reddish and her eyes a light brown and she had a sort of comforting smile. Only a blind man, or a fool, would deny that Natalie was very beautiful but since her mark wasn't the one to complete his, Jack tried his best to ignore her beauty. Next to her stood Fred, towering over her. Because of his muscular build and giant-height he looked menacing, but only from the neck down. Fred had the kindest-looking face that Jack had ever seen. His skin was light brown, his eyes a grassy green, his hair dark and his face seemed baby-like with no facial hair or pimples. His personality was a mixture between menacing, like his body, and kind, like his face. Jack scratched at his chin, where his recently-shaved beard was growing back.

"Hey guys. Ready?" he asks, smiling. "Yes, of course. After all that training this should be nothing" replies Fred. Natalie yawns and Jack notices the dark circles under her eyes. Her words aren't very clear but Jack hears them, "I just can't wait to get home" she rubs her eyes. "No need to be so happy about it, Nats" Jack says sarcastically, pulling her in for a hug. "Well, you promised to be the optimistic one. Considering why you even applied for this job" she says into his chest and he smiles. He remembers the second day of training, during their lunch break they spoke about why they applied for the position. Natalie’s only reason was money, Fred gave two reasons; money and he just simply loved "i products". Jack gave three. The first being money, the second being that he knew most of his two-month holiday would just be spent moping around at home (since he didn't have a very social life) and the third was that he thought getting a job would increase his chances of meeting the one this holiday. Logically he knew that he was wrong because his mother told him that it is not something we can control, that the universe (or God, as some people said) already had a specific plan for all of us and that we would meet them when the time was right.

 He remembered the time he first found out about the marks. People didn't always have them. In the year 2020, his mother had said, the Earth had become severely overpopulated. The population count had reached 8 billion, and was still rising. Poverty, global warming, food shortages and water shortages were beginning to affect everyone, including the rich. Oil had also become very rare. His mother said the main reason for overpopulation was that everyone was getting intimate with everyone. It was quite possible for one woman to have five children, all from different men. It became so bad that thousands, maybe even hundreds of thousands, of people were dying every day from hunger or diseases. Everyone knew that if this went on for much longer the human race would become extinct. Before the humans could do anything, however, nature began to take action; the Earth began to protect itself.

Over time, doctors got increasing reports of women being able to have only one child. At first they thought that it was just another disease but then they realised exactly what it was: the next step in human evolution. The evolution did not stop there, however. Nobody realised it at the time but these marks were part of the phase in human evolution. One day a man, no one remembers who he was, told the story of he met his wife. He claimed that for years he was drawn to a woman he had never met; this included having frequent dreams about her. He claimed that, though he didn't know if she even existed or not, he was attracted to no one but her. Then one day he met her, Juliet, and found that her mark complemented his. Together, the shape it made was a heart. And that is when everything changed. Suddenly every baby was being born with strange marks on their right arms, which was only half of a whole. Now, 200 years later, in the year 2220 Jack Graham begins his first day at work, anxious to meet his Juliet. The guy with the keys finally showed up, luckily before the manager. Jack checked his watch, 8:00 am.

The first two hours went by slowly because they had no customers. Everyone was just standing and talking. Then a man and a woman walked in, holding hands. Jack was closest to the door so he ended up helping them. They asked about the latest iPhone and Jack was able to tell them everything about it, because he had one. "It really is a great phone, you can't go wrong with it" he said finally. "Great. You're really good. We'll take two. One white, one black" said the man, smiling. Jack sent Fred to the back to get the phones while he tended to the couple. At 12 Jack, Fred, Natalie and the other new employees had their lunch break, till 1. Jack called his father and the four of them went to the food court. They sat down and started talking. "So, how's day one going?" asks Steve, looking across the table from Natalie to Fred, glad that his son had made friends. "Really slow, actually. But at least Jack made a sale" replies Natalie, yawing again.

The circles around her eyes had become darker in the four hours they'd been working. "Well I'm glad we got to talk so much" says Fred, putting a chip in his mouth. "What did you talk about?" asks Steve, looking at Jack. "Plato’s Symposium. What else?" replies Jack. "Oh yes" Steve says, smiling. Jack remembers the first time he read the text and the passage that stood out the most to him: According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves. Though he didn't believe in Greek mythology, he liked the idea. More so because he knew that, thanks to the marks, it was now sort of true. At 12:45pm they all made their way back. Steve to Dischem and the others to the iStore. "All I'm saying is that, with my luck, he was probably run over by a bus" Natalie snaps. Fred and Jack can't help but laugh. The rest of the day was just as quiet as the morning. Steve let Jack drive them home; once again there was no traffic. "In my opinion that's the best part about having only 4 billion people on the planet" says Steve, "Imagine all the traffic they had when there were 8 billion people!" Jack shuddered at the thought he had, 4 billion had to die. He found it hard to believe that they died naturally but there was no evidence to suggest anything else. When they reach the house Susan is sitting outside in the sun, reading a book.

 As they pull into the driveway she stands, smiling. "How was it?" she asks, looking at Jack. Jack sighs, "Long, terribly long. But I made a sale" Susan smiles and kisses Steve on the cheek, "And how was your day?" He puts an arm around her shoulder and they walk into the house, "It just got a whole lot better" Jack watched them enviously. He tried to remain hopeful that he would meet her but as the days went by he began to lose hope, slowly but surely until the last week of his contract when he finally decided that he would just wait until "the right" time, whenever that may be. He looked back on the past two months and realised that, even though she hadn't stumbled into the iStore, he didn't regret it one bit. He had become close friends with Natalie and Fred and they planned to keep it that way once the contract was over. The Monday of the last week he didn't go home at 5 with his father, he had other plans. He met an attractive girl that day and they clicked and decided to get milkshakes or ice cream later that day. He took out his iPhone and was about to dial her number when he saw her, walking towards him. She was slightly shorter than him, her long dark hair flowed over her olive skin, her deep blue eyes seemed to look not at him but rather at his soul, at the very core of who he was, he liked that.

Then she smiled, and that's what he liked most about her. She had the kind of smile that could brighten up anyone’s day, no matter how bad it was, the kind of smile which seemed to say a thousand words without actually saying any. She was wearing the same dress she had on when he saw her earlier. It was a casual floral dress and she looked good in it but the part he liked most about her outfit was that she wore sneakers with it. He hadn't seen her mark earlier because she had covered it up with make-up. As she came closer he saw that the makeup was still on. "Hey, Adriana" he called out, smiling. She returned the smile. That smile he thought silently to himself. They went to one of the ice cream shops and sat down. He checked his watch, 5:30 pm. They decided on milkshakes, he had chocolate and she had strawberry. They just sat and talked and drank their milkshakes. She told him about growing up in Italy and why they moved to South Africa. She said that her father was offered a position in South Africa and he didn't think twice about accepting and when they left she was 15. She still had her Italian accent and Jack loved it, every word she spoke was like melody to his ears.

When she stopped talking an awkward silence filled the air. They both looked down at their milkshakes then Jack suddenly had an idea and looked up, smiling. "Hey, have you ever played 21 questions?" he asked, drinking some milkshake through a straw. Suddenly he had a striking pain in his head and he closed his eyes tightly, shaking his head. Brain freeze. Once the pain had stopped they both started laughing. "No I haven't. What is it?" she asked, her laugh turned into a smile and her eyes met his. Neither of them said anything for a few seconds, getting lost in each other’s eyes. Then Jack came out of his daze, "Ok, the way it works is, I ask you a question and you answer it and then ask me a question and then I answer and that just goes on. It's supposed to be a fun way of getting to know someone" he says, his eyes still locked on hers. "Ok, sounds interesting. You go first" she replies, not daring to blink. "Hmm, ok. What is your favourite colour?" he asks, looking down then catching her eyes again. Those eyes. "Well, lime. What's yours?" she replies. "You're not allowed to ask my question, but I'll allow it this once, because I'm so sweet" he laughs. She laughs too. "Well, it used to be white, but now I'm thinking the shade of blue that your eyes have" he says, smiling and winking.

 She blushes and looks down. "Ok my turn. What school did you go to?" he asks. "Parktown girls. Ok I have a serious one. If you knew today was your last day on Earth, how would you spend it and why?" she asked, finally breaking the eye contact, but still smiling. "Hmmm, good question. Let's see..." he says, holding his neck looking out into the distance, staring at nothing for a few seconds before catching her eyes again and saying "I'd tell everyone I care about how much I love them, just so that I know that they know, and then I guess I'd just spend the day doing all my favourite things and invite you along" he smiles. "How come you cover yours?" he asks, looking at her right arm on the table, which seemed to have no mark. "Uhm, well I guess I just feel like it's private, you know. Not something I want to share with the world. I know I'm not allowed to ask the same question but why do you cover yours?" she asks, putting her right hand on his right forearm, where his mark is. He puts his left hand over her right hand. "The same reason you gave. It's private. And also, when I do eventually meet her I want her to fall for me, and not for the mark, you know? Probably sounds crazy" he replies, looking down at their hands.

She lifts his head with her free hand and smiles, "Doesn't sound crazy at all. I completely understand. And I think that you'll have no trouble making her fall for you" she says, smiling and winking. They continue their game of 21 questions for a while and then he looks at his watch, 10 pm. "Guess what" he says, putting his hand in his pocket to take out his wallet and smiling. "What?" she asks. 'We've been talking for five hours" he says, calling the waiter. They both start laughing. After he pays they make their way to his father’s car. After he made plans with Adriana he called his father to ask if he could use the car. "Yea sure, I'll tell your mom to get me. You have enough money?" was all his father had said. Adriana stayed 10 minutes away from the mall, almost within walking distance. Jack parked the car next to the pavement and got out to walk Adriana to her front door.

"Thank you f..." she starts to say but is stopped when Jack kisses her, she kisses him back. She puts he arms around his neck and he puts his hands around her waist to keep her close. They stay like that for a while, and then Jack pulls away. "Call me" she says. "I will" he replies, kissing her on her cheek and walking back to the car. When he gets home his parents are waiting up for him. "How was it?" his mother asks as soon as he walks through the front door. "It was great. She's amazing" he replies, smiling. "Is she the one you've been looking for?" his mother asks, smiling. "I think so" he replies. "So her mark complemented yours?" his father asks. Jack shakes his head, "We didn't show each other our marks" he looks down at his right arm. Susan and Steve exchange wary looks but don't say anything. "Well if you're hungry there's food in the kitchen" says Susan, breaking the silence. "No it's ok, I'm going to shower and then sleep. Good night, see you in the morning" he says, walking out of the room.

 He stares up at his bedroom ceiling, unable to fall asleep. His mind runs and he struggles to catch it. What if her mark is different? He asks himself silently and battles with the idea for what seems hours before finally coming to a conclusion. It doesn't matter, it won't matter he assures himself before falling asleep. He wakes to the sound of his alarm and grabs it to shut it off when he sees a message, from Adriana. He sits up suddenly, staring at his phone, and forgets all about the sound of the alarm. Good morning, hope you have a great day. Call me later? She wrote, with a smiley face. For the first time in two months he gets out of bed with a smile, showers and performs his daily morning routine. After breakfast him and his father head to the mall. When he gets to the iStore he finds Natalie and Fred. "And? How did it go with that chick?" Fred asks. "Ahh man, it was great. We just sat and talked for a few hours" he replies smiling. He seemed to be glowing, something which, in all the time Natalie and Fred have known him, has never happened. "Did you see her mark? Is she the one?" Natalie asks, almost too excitedly.

 Jack didn't blame her, for two months almost all he talked about was meeting her. "We didn't show each other our marks, but I've decided that it doesn't really matter" he replies, not quite sure what he means by that. Of course it mattered; it mattered more than anything in the world. Natalie’s eyes go wide. "You've fallen for her, haven't you?" she asks. Jack smiles and looks down at his feet. "You do know that if it isn't the same...” says Fred, but Natalie stops him from finishing his sentence.”Screw that. If he likes her then that's irrelevant" she snaps. But is it? He asks himself. "We'll talk about it at lunch" he says as the doors open. Four hours later the three of them make their way to the food court and sit down. "Where's your dad today?" Natalie asks, looking around. "I think he has a meeting or something" Jack replies, shrugging, "What did you mean earlier? When you said it doesn't matter?" he leans forward. "I meant that if you really like then that's all that matters, not some mark on your arm" she replies.

"But Nats...” Fred starts speaking before Natalie snaps at him, "What, Fred?! Should he just ignore how he feels and walk away?" Fred sinks into his chair. "Look. You spent two months waiting to meet some mystery girl you could fall in love with and now you have, don't let that mark on your arm change anything. That's all I mean" she says, folding her arms. Jack has never heard anyone speak about the mark this way, as if it was irrelevant. When they get back to the iStore after lunch he doesn't say much and a silence fills the air in the car on the way home. What Natalie said really got to him and he didn't even know who he could talk to about it. "What's troubling you?" his father asks eventually. Jack sighs. "Ok but whatever we talk about has to stay between us, you can't even tell mom. Deal?" he says, looking at his father who nods silently. "Ok. I've just been thinking. I really like that girl, Adriana, but what if her mark is different? What will I do then?" he takes a deep breath in and then exhales.

 "Well. You're still really young. I know that most people meet the one at around your age but you still have your whole life to meet her. And if this thing with Adriana gets serious the choice will always be yours. When I met your mother I didn't know she was the one because of our marks, I knew because of how she made me feel, no other girl before her made me feel that way, and no other woman after has. That's how you know" his father replies, reassuringly. Jack let out a smile; he suddenly knew what he had to do. When he gets home he says hi to his mom and goes to his room to call Adriana. She answers and he swallows hard. "Hey" he says casually. They make small talk for a while, asking how the others day went, before he gets to the reason he called. "So I was thinking, do you want to come over Saturday night? If you don't already have plans. I remember you said that you like lying on the grass and watching the stars, alone, but I was thinking that maybe we could do it together" he says, his heart pounding against his chest.

"One thing I like more than being alone is being alone with the right person" she replies. He takes a deep breath in and then lets it out "Awesome. I'll pick you up at 7, then?" he stands up. "I'll be waiting. My mom’s calling me for supper, I'll message you when I'm done" she says. "I'll be waiting" he repeats. She chuckles then hangs up. The rest of the week is slow. Schools had opened again and people had returned to work so the mall was almost always empty, and the iStore even emptier. He told Natalie and Fred about his plan, Natalie agreed but Fred barely agreed or disagreed. After what seemed four years, but what was really four days, Saturday came. He wanted everything to be perfect. He made a list of everything he thought he might need: Snacks, drinks, music, pillows and two blankets (One to lie on and one in case it got cold). Everything was set up outside by 5pm. "A little eager, aren't we?" Susan asked as she stepped outside.

They both chuckled, "Just want to make sure I have everything" he says, looking down at the blanket spread out on the grass; The snacks were in the middle, two pillows were set side-by-side at one end and the other blanket was set on the other end. He wasn't sure exactly what she liked so he just got a bit of everything; some chocolate, some gums, some crisp, some bubblegum. After he's satisfied with everything outside he has a shower, sprays on some perfume and gets dressed. His black all stars, a light blue jeans and a black t shirt under a light blue, long-sleeved, shirt which he left unbuttoned. His hair was set in its usual comb over. He checks his watch, 6pm. He leaves his house at 6:30pm. The sun had almost completely set and the sky was clear, perfect for stargazing. He gets to her house at 6:50pm and walks up to the front door, he knocks three times. Not too hard, not too soft. The door opens and he expects to see Adriana, instead he sees what must be her father.

"You must be Jack" he says, his Italian accent stronger than his daughters. "Yes. Jack Graham, nice to meet you" he replies, smiling and holding out his hand. "Donatello  Apollo, but you can call me Don. Please come in" her father replied, shaking Jacks hand. Jack followed Don to the living room where they sat down. "Adriana will come soon, sorry. You know women" says Don laughing and shaking his head. Jack smiles, "It's not a problem" Don tells Jack about his profession as an industrial psychologist and the company he worked for. He said his wife, Dr Elizabeth Apollo, worked as a clinical psychologist and was a lecturer at WITS University. After about 10 minutes Adriana walked into the room. Jack stared at her, barely even blinking. Her hair was loose and flowed over shoulders; she was wearing a casual white dress and black sneakers. She had a black cardigan in her hand. She smiled at him "Hey, you" he smiled back and stood up. "Hey" he said, walking towards her. "So what do you have planned for the night?" Don asks, standing up. "We're just going to hang out at my house; I won't bring her back too late" Jack replies.

Don walks them to the door and hugs his daughter, then kisses her on the forehead. "Have fun" he says so softly that it is almost a whisper. He shakes Jacks hand and they leave. "Your dad is really nice" he says in the car, looking at her. "Yea he is, such a sweetheart really" she replies, retuning his look. "You look really nice" he says, smiling. She blushes, "You're not too bad yourself" are the only words that come out. When they get to Jacks house he introduces her to Susan and Steve and they go outside. There is a light illuminating the backyard. She looks out at the open yard until she sees the blanket and then smiles. Jack puts the light off and they lay down, facing the night sky. Jack feels her hand next to his but doesn't take it. "Beautiful night" she says, slipping her fingers into the spaces between his. He moves his hand a bit, until her hand fits perfectly in his. They lay there for a while, Adriana pointing out all the constellations she could see. "You really know a lot about this stuff, hey" Jack says, sounding impressed.

"Yea. In Italy, when I was younger, my dad used to take me stargazing all the time" she replies. Jack sits up and then lays on his side, facing her. He is left breathless for a few seconds. "Adriana. I want to share something with you. But I want you to know that, no matter what, it won't change anything" he says, his eyes locked on hers. She sits up straight and faces him. Then she holds up her right arm. From the corner of his eye he could see her mark was visible but he couldn't make out what it was. Then he sits up straight, too. He starts rolling his right sleeve up and moves his right arm towards hers, slowly, while she moves hers towards his. They don't break eye contact and smile at each other. As soon as their arms touch he leans in and kisses her. She kisses him back. Then they pull away and look down at their joined arms.

Adriana looks up, her blue eyes wide. Jacks expression is blank. Blinking uncontrollably he looks up, then down, then up again.

By Mohamed Zayyan Variawa

opinions welcomed at zv0344@gmail.com

To save a life

She stared out into the crowd. There must have been 200 people, if not more. It made logical sense because he was well known; therefore many people would be at his funeral. The logic didn't help with the butterflies in her stomach or the terrible guilt she felt. Surprisingly enough, it didn't even help with the great sadness she felt. Breathe, she had to remind herself. Melissa Davids took a deep breath in and raised her hands to wipe the tears away from her eyes. "Paul...” she started addressing the crowd when she began to have a flashback of the time they first met. In her first year at UJ she decided to join the tennis team because she played in high school and she was, as people kept reminding her, quite good. She trained really hard and was selected as one of the players to play against WITS in a friendly match. There were only five of them chosen, three guys and two girls. The other girl was Lucy Sears, Melissa’s best friend. They had been friends since the first day of grade one when Lucy walked up to Melissa holding out her pinkie finger. "Friends?" she asked. "Friends." replied Melissa, smiling and lifting up her pinkie finger.

They went to WITS using one of UJ's mini-buses. When they got there the coach said they had an hour to walk around and check the campus out before having to return to the courts. Since none of them really knew WITS the five of them walked together. They walked from the tennis courts to a place they had driven passed, they saw people there and Melissa had thought to ask them where to go, but since she didn't even know what to ask for so she kept quiet. The main reason she decided to keep quiet, though, was her shyness. She had always been terribly shy and introverted and for the most part she was content with it but there were times, like now, where she wished she had more confidence. They kept walking aimlessly until they came to a flight of stairs next to a basketball court, they decided to climb it and see what waited for them at the top. When they reached the top of the stairs they saw what looked like a cafeteria with a building to their left and a pool to their right. It was afternoon already so the place was a bit empty but there were a group of people around one table wearing WITS-branded tracksuits, she assumed they were the tennis players. Before they could even decide what to do one of the boys wearing a WITS tracksuit walked up to them. He was tall and well built, obviously a gymmer. He had light skin, dark hair and his eyes were a piercing blue. Melissa couldn't help but get lost in them. He went around introducing himself to the five UJ students. Eventually he caught her staring and held out his hand. "Hi, I'm Paul, Paul Peters". At first she didn't know what to do, but his smile was so comforting that she shook his hand and returned the smile, "Hi, I'm Melissa"

When she opened her eyes she was back in front of the audience. They all stared at her blankly. In the first row she saw his mother, Mary, and his younger sister Kayla. Paul didn't talk about his father often, all Melissa really knew was that he died not long after Kayla was born. This was another reason she felt so guilty, Paul was the only male in the house and now his mother and sister were left alone, because of her. Of course they didn't look at it like that. Mary was too kind to think like that and Kayla is too young to think like that. Melissa knew, logically, that it wasn't her fault but she still felt guilty. She was back at the funeral again, after a few minutes of standing there all she managed to say was "Paul". She knew that she would have to say something soon. She saw her father, John, stand up but shook her head and he sat down. I have to do this alone, she thought. John was a very stern man and more often than not didn't even like boys looking at his daughter but had become quite fond of Paul. Paul was very friendly and was liked almost everywhere he went and by almost everyone he met, which made it even harder to accept that he was gone. Melissa looked at her mom, Elizabeth, who was sitting next to John. Elizabeth was an easy-going woman and, like John, was very fond of Paul. A smile crept on her face, a sort of reassuring smile, to let Melissa know that "it's ok, take all the time you need"

 Melissa looked down. She sniffed, "I'm the last to speak today, and everything that should have been said was already said. So that means the only thing I can tell you is how Paul inspired good in people, because he was such a positive person. Firstly, those of you who know me will know that before Paul I was very introverted and shy but then I met him and he literally guided me out of my shell and helped me become the type of person who can deliver speeches in front of hundreds of people. Secondly, one of his friends, who has asked me not to mention his name, was facing problems at home and had developed a serious drug addiction. When Paul found out he practically spent every second with the boy, helping him with his problems at home and helping him stay away from drugs by introducing him to tennis. Today that boy is one of the best tennis players I've seen and has a shot at playing at tournaments like Wimbledon and Roland Garros one day. I could go on and on, but then I would keep you here much longer...” she stared out into the crowd and started having another flashback. It was her birthday and Paul had taken her to Ocean Basket at Clearwater Mall for supper. They arrived early in the evening but when they left it was late, they had a habit of sitting and talking for hours, getting lost in each other’s company. Before they went to the car they went for a walk around the mall. It was empty except for a few couples they passed and the few security guards still on duty.

 After making their way around the mall they started walking toward the parking lot. Paul gave the parking ticket and some change to Melissa so she could pay while he fetched the car. The parking lot, like the mall, was deserted, just a few lone cars in sight. It was a cold night and Melissa could see the steam in front of her every time she exhaled. While she was paying she felt warm breath on her neck and, since there seemed to be no one else in the parking lot, she had assumed it was Paul. Then she felt a blade against her neck and the person behind her covered her mouth. She knew it wasn't Paul. She had taken a few self-defence MMA classes with Paul and knew exactly what to do in this situation, or so she thought. In that moment she realised that no amount of training can prepare you for the moment you are attacked. She used her right palm to grab and push the blade away from her neck, cutting herself a bit in the process, and once she thought it was a safe distance away she slammed the back of her head into her attackers face, hoping to stun him/her, even if just for a moment. It worked, the attacker stepped back and Melissa turned around and saw it was a man. He was taller than her and was skinny.

 He wore a big black hoodie so his face was covered. She used the moment and punched the guy in the neck as hard as she could, a technique she learned in a self-defence class, and the man then clutched his chest tightly, gasping for air. Then Paul pulled up and jumped out of the car and ran towards the man. Melissa grabbed the ticket from the machine and shouted out, "Let's go! I have the ticket, let's go!” Paul ignored her and punched the man hard in the face, his nose started bleeding. "You think you're strong because you can rob girls?!" he shouted out, Melissa could hear the anger in his voice. She knew that this was his ego acting out; the right thing to do would have been to drive away. He punched the attacker a few more times and then kicked him hard in the rib cage. The man fell down, seemingly unconscious, and Paul stood over him. "How strong are you now?" just as he spoke he heard Melissa scream and turned around to see why. As he turned around a powerful fist, which seemed to have come from nowhere knocked him. The force was so strong it pushed him back a few steps and left him momentarily stunned. When he became fully conscious again he saw that there were two more attackers, one was holding Melissa back and the other, the one who punched him, was standing in front of him.

He tasted blood in his mouth and spat it out. Then he raised his fists, protecting his face like he was taught in the self-defence class. The second attacker simply laughed and pulled out a gun. He pointed it directly at Pauls head. Melissa managed to bite her retainers hand let out a scream "NO!” Paul looked at her and let out a smile. It was the type of smile that you share with someone you love on a warm sunny day, not on a cold night when you have a gun pointed at your face. Melissa started into his deep piercing blue eyes and got lost in them one last time, imagining that it really was a warm sunny day. The sound that came next was deafening, and it brought her back to reality. The man had pulled the trigger and the bullet had hit Paul on the right side of his head, he fell down instantly. Blood poured out of the wound and ran down his face. He still had his warm, loving smile for a short moment. Melissa screamed out as loud as she could but her restrainer slapped her and then they left, in Paul’s car, taking the first attacker with them. She ran towards Paul’s body and checked if he had a pulse, he didn't. She had to reach into his pocket to get his phone because they had taken her bag and she called an ambulance. When she put the phone down she looked up and saw three guards coming towards her but all she could do was close her eyes and scream. When she opened them again she was at the funeral. Her father was now holding her and she realised that she had been screaming. With tears streaming down her face she turned towards the mic and all that came out was "I'm sorry..."

By
Mohamed Zayyan Variawa

opinions welcome at zv0344@gmail.com